Stress, the Nervous System, and Why Your Back Pain Isn’t Just a Training Problem
If you’re a man in midlife dealing with persistent back pain, chances are you’ve asked some version of this question:
“What should I be doing in the gym to fix my back?”
It’s a fair question. You train. You care about your health. You want to solve the problem.
But after years of working with men in their 40s and 50s, I’ve noticed a consistent pattern:
Many of the men with ongoing back pain are wired.
They’re switched on from the moment they wake up. Anxious. Busy. Driven. Always thinking ahead. Always in "go mode."
And their nervous system never really gets a chance to stand down.
The Pattern I See Over and Over Again
A lot of these men experience pain during movements like:
Deadlifts
RDLs
Good mornings
Back extensions
Anything involving repeated hip flexion or moving in and out of a hinge tends to flare things up.
So naturally, the focus goes straight to:
Technique
Load
Core stability
Mobility drills
“Activation” work
And yes, there are things we can and should adjust in training.
But here’s the part that often gets missed.
The Hip Flexor–Back Pain Connection (That Nobody Talks About)
When someone lives in a chronic sympathetic nervous system state (fight or flight), certain muscles tend to hold tension all the time.
One major culprit is the deep hip flexor complex, particularly the iliacus and psoas.
Here’s why this matters.
These muscles attach to the femur (upper leg)
They cross the pelvis
And they insert directly onto the front of the lumbar spine (multiple attachment points)
When they shorten and stay “on”:
They pull the pelvis forward
They increase tension through the front of the spine
They create compression and strain that is felt in the lower back
So even though the pain shows up in the back, the source of tension is often at the front of the body.
When you repeatedly hinge in and out of hip flexion under load, especially while already stressed, these muscles can tighten further and aggravate symptoms.
Stretching the hip flexors can help. Doing it between sets can give short-term relief. And that’s often enough to get through a session.
But for many men, the relief doesn’t last.
Which leads to the bigger question.
Why Training Alone Often Doesn’t Fix Stress-Related Back Pain
If your nervous system is always in fight or flight, your body behaves accordingly.
From an evolutionary perspective:
Tension equals readiness
Tight muscles mean you can run, fight, or escape quickly
The body prioritises survival over comfort
In a chronically stressed state:
Muscles don’t fully relax
The body stays guarded
Flexor muscles tend to dominate
There’s a subtle pull toward flexion and protection
Some research suggests that under threat, the body instinctively curls inward... a protective, almost fetal response. Others point out that hip flexors are heavily recruited in escape-based movements like sprinting.
Different theories. Same outcome.
Persistent tone in the hip flexors. Persistent tension through the spine. Persistent back pain.
And no amount of perfect deadlift technique will override a nervous system that never feels safe enough to let go.
The Real Question Isn’t “What Should I Do in the Gym?”
It’s this:
“What in my life is keeping my nervous system switched on all the time?”
This is the uncomfortable part.
Because most men would rather:
Train harder
Optimise their program
Add more structure
Chase another goal
That’s the Warrior mindset. It’s familiar. It’s rewarded. It feels productive.
But when back pain is stress-driven, doing more is rarely the solution.
What the Body Might Be Trying to Tell You
Pain isn’t always a mechanical failure. Sometimes it’s a signal.
A quiet message that says:
You’re pushing too hard
You’re carrying too much
You’re never fully switching off
So instead of asking:
“What exercise will fix my back?”
It may be more useful to ask:
Where am I constantly rushing?
Where am I living on autopilot?
Where do I only feel ‘enough’ when I’m ticking boxes?
When do I actually slow down?
When do I sit still without distraction?
When do I breathe without trying to optimise it?
This isn’t easy work. Especially for men who’ve built their identity around output, discipline, and responsibility.
But the nervous system doesn’t respond to effort. It responds to safety, presence, and rhythm.
Training Still Matters, But It’s Only One Piece
To be clear:
Training is still important
Strength work still matters
Intelligent loading, technique, and exercise selection all play a role
But when back pain is intertwined with chronic stress, training becomes supportive, not corrective.
The real shift happens outside the gym:
Creating space
Reducing unnecessary load
Learning how to downshift
Allowing the body to feel safe enough to relax
Until that happens, the muscles will keep holding on.
A Different Way Forward
If you’re a man in midlife dealing with ongoing back pain, this isn’t a sign that you’re weak or broken.
It may be a sign that your nervous system has been in overdrive for too long.
And the solution isn’t more effort. It’s better awareness.
Less striving. More presence. Less pressure. More calm.
Sometimes the strongest thing you can do isn’t lifting heavier.
It’s learning how to let go.
Want Support That Looks Beyond Just Sets and Reps?
If you’re dealing with back pain and you know deep down that stress, load, and lifestyle are part of the picture, then generic programs probably aren’t going to cut it.
My Online Personal Training is built specifically for men in midlife who want to train hard without constantly fighting their body.
This isn’t about:
Grinding through pain
Ignoring stress signals
Or chasing numbers at the expense of longevity
It’s about:
Intelligent strength training
Respecting load versus capacity
Managing stress inside and outside the gym
Building a body that feels strong, resilient, and reliable again
If you’re ready to train in a way that supports your nervous system, your lifestyle, and your long-term health, you can learn more here:
https://www.thesustainabletrainingmethod.com/maverick-training
Sometimes the smartest move isn’t doing more.
It’s getting the right support so your body can finally stand down and recover.
